Open letter to 2007.

Dear 2007:

You were like a dysfunctional lover. Always in my face with drama when I could ill afford it, always going dark when I felt like I most needed light. I spent at least 30 of your 52 weeks wondering exactly what I did in 2006 to deserve your angst. You brought out the very worst in me.

Or so I thought.

I did some reflecting over the last few weeks, and perhaps you were more the strong silent type rather than the evil, mean spirited life partner. Perhaps your silence and the slow, creaking passage of time was by your kind hearted design as opposed to an indication of your lack of willingness to participate in my plans. Perhaps...like a wise old soul, you were on a greater mission to teach me some lessons. And as usual, I wasn't going to even consider your point of view until I vehemently expressed everything I so desperately wanted you to understand. Still, you waited and continued to hand me some undeniable truths. Whether I wanted them or not.

I want to thank you for putting the mirror up in front of my face. For putting the monsters under my bed and slinging around the worst case scenarios until I came face to face with all of the things I dreaded most...and saw that perhaps they weren't so bad, after all.

Had it not been for loving, losing, living and dying...I might not have learned:

• No one's assessment of what I need, will ever be more relevant than my own assessment of what I desire.
• Nothing is ever as it seems - and all that seems barely ever is.
• Life is really simple (and much more enjoyable) once you acknowledge that you actually have little to do with controlling it.
• You can choose, even if it's choosing not to.
• The sweetest gifts are the ones you never see coming.
• Unsolicited advice can be offered, but it doesn't have to be accepted.
• Age? Doesn't have SHIT to do with maturity. (Experience, rarely does either. )

This year, I learned I was a potter. I learned to "allow" the gifts my grandmother gave me and acknowledge the many ways they have protected and guided me thus far. I learned that sometimes knowing what you know, is all you need to know. I learned the wisdom of silence and the reward of patience. I learned to love me, in my skin...as I am...in this very moment. 
I learned that there is always a tomorrow, and that when you lose...you never really do.

I wanted to call you all sorts of names, 2007. I wanted to remember every horrifying moment of angst. Every tear. Every sleepness night. But now, as I prepare myself for a new year...I realize for each dark night you gave me a brilliant dawn. You gave me choices...and with those choices I opt to thank you for priming me.

Tell 2008 to get ready. I'm anxious to begin.

Cheers, 

RPM