18 posts tagged “austin”

Photo comment: I'd like to say that that photo is not at all a representation of what vertigo feels like. They need a photo of a child spinning around and around for three minutes, then coming to a halt. THAT, is what vertigo feels/looks like.

I'm making a note of it, since I seem to always want to forget that April/May are my danger months in Austin.

Ever since I moved here in 2005, April and May have been dizzy months. Usually a bad spell for about a week or two...and then lingering effects hanging around until June. I've become adjusted to the vertigo, but I still have to talk myself out of a panic attack every time I feel a spin coming on.

It's disruptive to say the least. At the pottery studio, I had to stumble into the Director's office to find a seat and some privacy until the studio stopped whirling in front of my eyes and I could ease back the cold sweats, nausea and trembles that quickly follow.

I'm considering doing acupuncture to see if I'll get any relief from the vertigo, and the underlying sinus issues that always seem to prompt it. I've tried everything under the allergy sun, and while they help to eliminate the stuffy nose and sinus headaches, they've failed to come up with the magic elixir to quell that and the peripheral vertigo that always seems just an awkward head tilt or swivel away.

Perhaps I should check into panic acupuncture as well. Seems like I'm getting a lot of practice with those symptoms, as I ever prepare to hit the deck and hold onto the floor for dear life.

As my head swims through this final month of pinwheels, lightheaded fogginess and cold sweats everytime I stand up too fast...I wonder again why for me so many themes in my life relate to balance, and the havoc caused by a lack thereof.

The Empty Bowls Project is a national series of charitable events designed to address the issue of hunger (so bizarre that that would be an issue, especially in a country as able as ours) by supporting local food banks in the participating cities. It's a great way from those who love art, pottery or...bowls...to come together and buy some amazing pieces from some really awesome local potters AND demonstrate a commitment to support your local food bank.

The concept is simple, you attend your local Empty Bowls event, make a charitable donation by purchasing a bowl, and have that bowl filled with yummy soup. Proceed to the yummy soup feasting area, and enjoy some music. When you're done? We'll wrap that bowl up for you and send you on your way.

I'm sure it's done with a different twist depending on your area, but if you happen to be in Austin on Sunday, November 18th, be sure to visit us at Clayways. If you're not in Austin, keep your eyes out for your local Empty Bowl event. This will be my first year, but I'm looking forward to it becoming a habit. Let me know if you're dropping by, so that I may hug you and direct you to some soup.

That is, of course...if you don't mind being hugged. If you mind the hugs, I'll just point and grin.

It's only fitting that I do these now as I'm back on the road again, effective tomorrow. Back to San Antonio. I will not slander the town anymore, because I can be a bit obnoxious and I know it.

Anyhoo...my random thoughts.

1. Dear NFL: If you're going to pack up two teams and ship them to England for a football game, can you at least pick two teams that are hot and fun to watch? Don't get me wrong...the Giants are fun for me to watch, but that's largely because of the perverse longing I feel for Michael Strahan. The Miami Dolphins? Miami doesn't even watch the Dolphins...why punish England?

2. Dear Austin, TX: I kid about the whole United States of Texas thing, but now I'm starting to wonder. How is it that I put on the Austin 8 all day news channel, or the nightly news...and never hear one lick of news that doesn't somehow link back to our town? I mean, I'm glad to hear that Great Granny Clara just ate her hundredth popsicle...but I'm kinda thinking you might wanna broaden your range a bit.

3. Speaking of broadening...A friend of mine was lamenting about some frustrations he's having with a...shall we say...cranially-challenged lover. In exasperation, he says to her today that she needs to consider broadening her palette regarding a project she's working on. When she stares blankly at him, he goes, "Palette, you know what I mean, right?" He says she answers...

(wait for it)

"Pontius Palette, he's the one that killed Jesus Christ."

I know he made it up...but daaaaamn, I nearly peed my pants on that one.

4. For those of you that are my tweeps, you may have noticed a ridiculously high preoccupation with "candeh" last week. I never indulged. And I still have not. I've just decided to stop torturing you with it.

5. There are two days left to this horrid mercury retrograde we're experiencing. It is painful, all sorts of people slipping, falling, panicking, having mechanical issues and general fuckery. I think someone should banish merc retros and send them packing. I just do not want. I'm high strung enough...I need no celestial intervention.

6. So my livingroom tank and bedroom tank are both thriving now that I've gotten my novice experience under my belt. The bedroom tank has 4 tiger barbs, 2 albino tiger barbs, 2 green barbs and 2 blue gourami. What a fun tank that one is to watch during evenings of insomnia. The livingroom tank may have a problem. I have three albino tin foil barbs in there. Red eyes, silvery reflective body, cool fish. But um...they are growing. And...apparently after I did my research...I gasped. Audibly. These lil darlings? Can grow to be eight inches (which would explain why it seems they've grown an inch in the past month). I may have to take them back, because 24 inches of fish in a 20 gallon tank might qualify as fish cruelty. Not to mention there are three tiger barbs that are looking like they might be a little nervous.

 
7. Neighbors may not like my passive aggressive "re-transferring" of their trash to THEIR bin. But I do not give a quarter of a fuck. You make a lot of trash frat boys, I understand. But do not assume I'm not using my bin. And ESPECIALLY do not assume I'm not going to notice that your bags have wandered "innocuously" into my bin. You know by now that I'm just ignorant enough to do exactly what I did. Love ya! (not)

8. Apparently, I'm not enough of a diva for my 13 year old neighbor who bounded into my house yesterday, wandered back into my bedroom only to gape in horror as she watched me randomly trimming my hair in the mirror. When she asked me if I was afraid I might make a mistake, considering how difficult it was for me to actually see what I was doing, I replied..."It's hair. It'll grow back." Apparently, fabulous women do not say these things.

9. Ready for some shock and awe? How about some shock and euw? I've failed to mention the now mildly painful ganglion on the top of my right foot. Apparently, I dropped something heavy on my foot at some point (so sad that I've done that so many times I'm not sure which moment did it)...and over time and with running on top, I've formed this wondrous knot on the top of my foot that someone referred to as a testicle. Humph. After this series of tradeshows has ended, lil RPM must visit the podiatrist for removal or...*shudders* draining. It doesn't HURT persay, but I cannot wear any of the boots in my kickass boot collection, and this...will never do. But it's also going to mean a few weeks in a soft cast and crutchery if they actually decide to cut the thing out *faints*. That may mean no pottery for a bit (that's my pedal foot)...so let's root for drainage. Did I just say lets root for drainage? GACK!

10. I have no more random thoughts. Weren't those enough?

I love those, don't you?

Earlier this week, I found out my vox neighbor Cheryl was going to be in Austin for an event. There's so much to like about her. Incredible artist, awesome (and I do mean incredible) first name, keen sense of humor and oceans of other good stuff I couldn't put a finger on because we've never met. At least, not until Friday.

We've all met people from our online existence and faced disappointment when we find that virtual reality seems so much more than the alternative. But how cool is it, when you meet someone and every element of who they are comes shining through?

I had an awesome time. I ate the best sushi I've had in Austin (despite a 45 minute wait), I even managed to fall over a chair and laugh about it (there will be NO photos of that, thank you).

So, on a weary Saturday evening, I raise a glass of syrah and say, cheers to virtual pals who become friends, cheers to great sushi and cheers to the moments you never saw comin'.

Yes, Mother's Window Tint. I am so talking to you. Let me explain to you as clearly as I can, why you will never see a dime from me.

I've been wanting to tint the windows on my truck since I moved to Austin. No, not "bling, look at me I think I'm the shit," tint. But, "Holy Smokes and Jesus I need to protect my ass from these leather seats," tint. I've put it off since I moved considering it an excess expense. Well, I decided not to put it off any longer. So I asked around abour reputable tint places.

You have to be careful. Ever seen that car driving by with cracked "veins" going down their windows? Or rollled, bubbled "I am obviously aftermarket" tint? This is one of those purchases where you get what you pay for. So, after a few conversations, I decided to take a look at Mother's.

Yeah. Go look at it. I'll wait.

Splash page. BAM. Black Ford Mustang, and some skank lady in the process of peeling out of her clothes. Now if this was a website promoting a strip club, fine. I have no beef with that. Because your site, represents what you're selling. Sex, or it's cheap substitution. But this is a car site, promoting what's supposed to be best in town tinting and car stereo installations and the like. Imagine Ford, Porsche, BMW or some other car make, featuring half naked women peeling out of their clothes to promote their product?

We've got a long way to go...but I thought we came farther than this.

I understand who they're targeting the site to. The demographic of their market that believes slapping tint on a 15 year old piece of shit will suddenly make them desirable to the opposite sex. I think it's safe to say I don't fall into that demographic. And I'll burn my ass completely off, before you'll ever see a dime of my money.

Now I realize my teeny little boycott doesn't change much. But I've already verbally threatened quietly suggested that a few of my friends think twice about taking their vehicles there. In the meantime...

I'm off to look for more tint. From someone that doesn't expect me to make my decision based on a pair of fucking d-cups.

Addendum: Speaking with a friend over the phone, and sent him the link. He says, "Jeez. Did you tell them you wanted window TINT, as opposed to window TITS?"  Oh. Lord. Save me.

1. No matter how your heart aches, with time and your willingness it will heal and you will find your smile.

The worst pain passes with time. It doesn't matter. You can try and outrun it if you'd like, but it will be there waiting for you to run out of gas. It will wait for you to hand yourself over to it. And I'm a huge advocate of doing that. Give yourself over to it. Bawl your eyes out. Play every sad song you can get your hands on. Sob, and then look at the damage in the mirror. Curl up in your ugliest robe and watch television until your eyes glaze. Hide from the world. Spiffy up your stamp collection and practice your Ebay skills. And for God sake...be patient with yourself. Don't let anyone rush you out of the house and into some ridiculous "activity designed to force new people down your throat" until you know you're ready for it. Allow yourself to be ugly for a moment. Get it all out of your system so you don't preserve any nonsense for the next go around.  Swear you'll never feel sunshine on your face again. Go ahead. Because eventually, (only when you're ready)...

You will. And it will feel delicious, even though you're flying solo.

2. There is absolutely nothing sweeter then meeting your true self, and really liking that person.

For me, trying to figure out who I was seemed fairly simple. Sure, I am RPM the ____________ and the _____________ and the _______________. I could add a host of other titles like sister, daughter, friend, employee and whatever. But titles don't truly explain who you are. What you really believe. What really, really makes you happy, content and peaceful.  It's so easy to get caught up in "achievements" as definitions of who you are. More importantly, it is so easy to think you're a little "less" of a something...because there are things you've yet to do.

I think the sweetness of life is existing within a specific moment, knowing yourself, knowing what you believe and being totally at ease and even...jubilant  about it. Allowing yourself to acknowledge that you are wonderfully perfect, today. As you are. A beautiful work in progress that requires no validation from the external world to believe it.

3. The best moments, are the ones that don't come with bells and whistles attached.

I find myself grinning for no obvious reason. Perhaps it's the sunshine, perhaps it just because I find it hard to restrain a grin after too long. Some of the best joys for me have been things that might not seem like much to anyone else...and that's alright.

My baby roses are blooming.

My 13 year old neighbor loves to go for walks with me, and I remember children have a way of making you see the wonder of yourself. All the things you take for granted. She and I can go for a walk and talk about life, and just watching her giggle about the first boy she's crushing on, brings back such memories and makes me excited for her at such an interesting turn in her life. She picks my brain, which reminds me that I have one.

Making new friends. Receiving the most amazing mixtapes from an incredibly awesome new friend. Gifts and random act of of kindness from beautiful souls. Listening to new music and nodding your head in total disbelief. A stranger smiles at you, and you smile back...because what's the point of frowning? Looking up at a blue sky...and knowing for absolutely no reason at all, that you are alright. No...actually, you're stellar. For no reason at all.

4. If you know everything is going to be alright, eventually...it will be.

Even if you aren't inclined to believe it. If you say it aloud...something weird happens. You find yourself able to laugh at some of the things that make you angry. You can remember pain, without tears. You can forgive. You can let go. You can be okay with not having the answers to some things. You begin to trust in something you can't fold up and put in your pocket. And...you send up a message to the universe that says not only do you trust yourself, but you trust it. Everything that is bad...isn't always bad, and as the saying goes, "sometimes when you win, you lose, and when you lose, you win."

Don't ask me who said it. I think I stole it from a movie. In fact...I'm almost sure I did. 

5. I found a new love. It's brown. It's firm and it molds according to my will.

I started pottery classes this weekend at Clayways. I've always wanted to learn wheel throwing, since I was a kid. I put it off, and put it off. Finally, I signed up for the classes and the first one rolled around this weekend. I was grumpy the morning of. Mostly fearful. What if I walked in and my new classmates hated me? What if I walked in to find out I hated this self-proclaimed "secret interest" I harbored for so long? What if it was nothing at all like what I hoped it would be?

My friend Wes told me once, you dread your best moments until they materialize. So true. I walked in and as soon as I tip toed into that quiet studio on Sunday morning, I felt right at home. With my instructor, my classmates...and with the clay. I'm the only beginner in the class, so my instructor told me we'd probably just do a tour, an overview of the wheel, the tools and the basic rules of the studio and premise for pottery making. By the end of the first half of the three hour class, she decided I was ready to throw. By the end of the class, I made three bowls. I impressed my mates, my instructor...and myself. Nothing goes to the kiln until the mid point of the 11 week course.

My instructor watched over my shoulder as I centered my third lump of Siegel clay on the wheel. "I'd say you feel right at home here."

Truer words have never been spoken. In Austin. In life. And in my own skin.

So the aquarium has been filled, the water conditioned, the ph, nitrate and ammonia levels monitored.

Today, we introduce three fish to their new community. (Yes, if you think I'm kidding about any of this...please note I am quite serious).

George is hanging out with me while he's in town for sxsw. I know Jason will be arriving today at some point as well, and hopefully, the big business with my company will not deter me from hanging out with them this evening. Even if it does, we hope to continue the Magnolia Cafe tradition initiated last year before they head back to Cali. I met some friends of George's last evening at Threadgill's and got some very exciting information on a new fiction site that I know some folks will be eager to sink their teeth into. (Get ready Barry, I think this one is right up your alley)

But anyway...back to the fish community.

I picked up a background today to go with the Rome theme of the tank, apparently fish don't like staring at cream colored walls. So I need to run and get some silicone adhesive to get that up. Once the first members have joined the community, you'll be among the first to know.

So as you may recall, I was in Santa Clara this week for a tradeshow. I bitched about SJC for a wee bit on my first day in the area, but other than that, I had precious little time to hang out with all that is Vox. I mean to tell you, I have a serious addiction going on here. But we'll get to that in a moment.

I have some family in the San Jose area, so this tradeshow meant getting a chance to hang out with my Uncle and some cousins while prepping for the tradeshow in neighboring Santa Clara. I haven't been in that area in nearly five years, so I was eager to catch up, and one thing I love about family is that the more things change, the more they stay the same. Being able to pick up precisely where you left off without a hitch is always good. My cousin A, is a serious family historian, so I got to see some old pictures of us way back when. Ever noticed how as you age, and grow more clear about who you truly are - you can see SO much more in your face as a child then just the smile, eyes and crazy outfits? That's surreal.

So what was good? A break away from all the evolution that's been available to me in Austin. My uncles' hospitality, and my cousins and their humor. The nice, neat proximity to the show, to Patty's and to all the places I needed to frequent in between. The way the clouds and the sky seems to be right at your fingertips nearly everywhere you go in the bay area.

The flight in, losing myself in thoughts over snow capped mountains and a cold window pane against my forehead (I will forever be a child in that way). The new friends I always seem to make wherever these travels take me. Yes...[that was all good].

Tradeshow wasn't highly trafficked, but it gave me the chance to meet some additional contacts that may be critical to the growth of our business. The folks at the neighboring booths were awesome, so we all passed the loads of slow time cracking jokes, exchanging schwag and business cards. Sometimes I forget while working virtually, how much I miss the comraderie of professional peers. That combined with enough leads to at least justify the expense of the event, is enough to get tagged...for me.

What was awesome? *insert cheese grin here* If you visited Patty, Deb, Ben, Laurel then you have already seen some pictures and heard about the fun. I was convinced I would get lost, be terribly tired or worse yet, required to stay at the show longer then  I expected. But everything fell into place, as events destined to happen usually do...and I made it to Patty's place for some of the MOST delicious treats (Patty: I need to know the names of those cheeses, and the peppers stuffed with Feta, I forgot to get them from you!!!), awesome company and some of the cutest kitties I've ever encountered (you too Meisha, hehehe).

Not to mention the kitchen gadgetry...but that's another post for another time. Ever go somewhere and feel ridiculously at home the moment you walk through the doors? Well, Patty masters that. When I arrived to warm hugs and big grins, I was ready to stay...for longer then that cursed itinerary of mine would allow.

Awesome? Please...I can't do it justice. Patty's hospitality and frightening ability to intuit just what your mind, tummy and taste buds are searching for. Deb's ability to see through to the precious little I don't share here about what goes on beneath the surface of me - and for us to connect on it after a hug? Ben's impeccable sense of timing and an appreciation for some of those other little residuals I choose not to address out loud. (PS...there's a post coming once I've had a chance to find the appropriate words for it...but I know you guys know what I'm getting at..)

Laurel and Stacy, didn't it feel like we've all known each other a bit longer then we actually have? I tell you...I'm astounded. There truly is just something about vox. Not sure all the words in the world could ever explain it.  And Meisha?  Come ON!!!!! How does it get any more memorable than that?

I took none of these great pictures (that you're likely already seen, lmao). Thanks to Ben and Patty and Annabelle for capturing the priceless moments. I raise my glass and look forward to many more.

But of course, before I get back to a sea of out of office emails and things to do...let me tell you about the ugly. Yes...there was ugly. It was warmer in Austin then it was in Cali. I must've brought the bad weather with me. A torrent of rain on Thursday morning killed any chance we had for good attendance on the final day of the show. We wrapped up our booth early and headed to the land of the lost airport nearly three hours early. So...you may ask what tired expositioners do at the end of a tradeshow with hours to spare in a busted up airport?

You drink. And you drink. And you drink. Until the airport feels cozy and quaint, until you believe you will turn every lead you acquired into a sale, until 3 hours turns into ten minutes to get to your departure gate. Do I need to tell you where this is headed? Three hours later, RPM is stewed on gin and tonics (why gin? I'm still trying to find the answer to this question), sitting on a full American flight back to ATX sitting beside a young mother and her rambunctious, refuses to sleep ten month old with the hardest little baby shoes I've ever seen been kicked by in my life. Armed with the sippy cup from hell finding its way to my lap, I wafted between green sleep (hello quease) and nasty eye rolls tossed in the general direction of the little darling who used me as a sippy cup rest and kickboard for a three and half hour flight. When did she fall asleep? While we waited to de-plane after landing, naturally.

I got off the plane, found the restroom...and uh...got reacquainted with the six or so gin and tonics consummed. I want to believe that's all I had. I would have further discussions with these cursed beverages once I got in the house. Mecca could barely hide her disgust. I managed to dial a friend in South Carolina who (hanceforth be referred to as K) was waiting up to know I made it home. He was very supportive as he stifled laughter very poorly. Even pickled I have to say, he has a way about him.

I think I'm gonna like him. Nothing ugly about that. But that's another story for another day.

An Austin landscape to decorate my vox. Ahhhh...makes me homesick.

Still in Philadelphia, my other hometown, tending to a rapidly recovering father and a very successful knee replacement. After five straight days of 12 hour stints at the hospital, I have concluded the following things:

1. The nursing/resident staff at Presbyterian hospital needs to slap their hospital administration in the face. Those poor folks are run thin. I didn't intend to hang out like I did, but I was very concerned my Dad wouldn't be bathed, medicatred and monitored with any regularity otherwise. I don't blame them, but I will say to the administrators, stop sitting in your ivory towers viewing pie charts and calling up efficiency studies and actually get your ass in your facility to see what these folks are really trying to manage.

2. Caring for a parent with love and focus really can create a lot of emotional, technical and mental strain. I am more fatigued trying to manage my Dad's rehab schedule, medications, house tending along with being the point person for his many friends, family, tenants and coworkers...is doing it's best to wear what is usually an ever ready smile completely off of my face. Much as I am gonna miss the quality time with my Pop, I am looking forward to arriving back in Austin to get a long relaxing steamy shower, a good run and a full night of uninterrupted sleep.

3. There is no place like home, especially after having your knee ripped out, and replaced with bionic man super charged sport upgrades. I now know where I get my viking like tolerance for pain. I give credit where credit is due...my Dad is toughing it out apparently like no one I've ever encountered.

4. I've been avoiding this space because I've been so tired, so unmotivated to log anything that's swarming about my watermelon head and trying to reserve what energy I've had remaining to stay on target with my professional responsibilities. I am writing though, the novel/mission continues and apparently a pinch of depression has helped me transition my way through some pretty difficult portions of the greater story.

Miss you guys., I've been trying to peek in, will be back in full swing on Wednesday. Dad's got a shot coming in about 45 minutes, so I'll be catching up with you soon.